:(

shrinking my pockets

:P

Mommy group therapyA psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four youngMothers and their small children. 'You all have obsessions,' he observed.To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating.You've even named your daughter Candy.'He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your obsession is with money.Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.'He turned to the third Mom, Kathy: 'Your obsession is alcohol.This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.'At this point, the fourth mother, Joyce, quietly got up, took her littleboy by the hand and whispered...............'Come on Dick, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Lets pickWilly up from school and go home.

pepsi maa...

A man and his wife were in a court for their divorce case.The Problem was who should get custody of the child.
The wife screamed and jumped up and said: "Your Honor. I brought The child into the world with all the pain and labor.The child Should be in my custody.
"The judge turned to the husband and said: "What do you have to Say in your defense?"
The man sat for a while contemplating... then slowly rose. "Your Honor... If I put a dollar in a Pepsi Vending Machine and a Pepsi Comes out...Whose Pepsi is it... The machine's or mine?"

read this! haha

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

baru baru ni, polis banyak yang sebok sebok nk kejar aku... bkan aku xnak berhentikan kerete aku... tp dah diorang xdpt kejar? haha... nasib la kn? saman pun dah menimbun, and dgn operasi malam yang x henti henti... susah bagi aku dan kawan kwan seangkatan nak test kete kete kami..

today is the day

all i need is some sleep... a proper one... hmmmm..